(Cut to scene: Office stairwell, returning from getting lunch. Me: Old fart Producer walking with Dan: Young, cool and still unjaded PA)
Me: Hey Dan, happy birthday. Sorry I missed the cake yesterday.
Dan: It's alright. The real party is this weekend.
Me: (sarcastic) You can't possibly party yet. How old are you? 12? 13?
Dan: Very funny. No, I just turned 23.
Me: Oh, that's cool... 23 is a good age. I just turned 23 too.
Me: No... but I did just celebrate the 11th anniversary of my 23rd birthday.
Dan: Wait... (calculating)... You're 34?
Me: Yes! You win the grand prize!
Dan: Are you kidding?
Me: About the prize? Yea, I'm kidding.
Dan: No, wait, seriously... You're not really 34 are you?
Me: Yes.... why?
Dan: You can't be 34. You're too hip.
Me: (rendered speechless)
Author's commentary: Being a self-described band-geek my entire life, I don't think anyone over the age of seven has ever thought of me as "hip"... and I was only cool to them because I accidentally made a mixture of vinegar and baking soda explode all over the entire surface area of my sister's kitchen, including the ceiling. I doubt that technically classifies as "hip"... but I'll be sure to ask James Brown when I see him in the afterlife.