> > ADVERTISEMENT FEATURE
> > * Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
> > * Do you suffer from shyness?
> > * Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
> > If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or
> > pharmacist about White Wine.
> > White Wine is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident
> > about yourself and your actions. White Wine can help ease you out of
> > your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing
> > to do just about anything.
> > You will notice the benefits of White Wine almost immediately,
> > and with a regiment of regular doses you can overcome any
> > obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.
> > Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past, and you wi ll
> > discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living,
> > with White Wine.
> > White Wine may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or
> > nursing should not use White Wine. However, women who wouldn't
> > mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.
> > Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting,
> > incarceration, erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing,
> > loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table
> > dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing
> > Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and
> > Naked Twister.
> > WARNING:
> > The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are
> > whispering when you are not.
> > The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an
> > idiot.
> > The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends
> > over and over again that you love them.
> > The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can
> > sing.
> > The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-
> > lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
> > The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are
> > tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
> > The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are
> > laughing WITH you.